Today’s topic is about how to help people.
Majority of us don’t know how to help people.
To some of us, it has even become a weakness.
Because we’re so kind, we open our arms wide to everyone—helping with every single one of their demands.
And until a couple of our acts of kindness backfire, we see nothing wrong with this approach.
And don’t get me wrong, there is nothing bad about being overly kind and having an open-arm policy.
But the issue is that too much of everything is bad.
We end up offering too much to people who don’t deserve it.
Or we create entitled people who always rely on us.
Or people who misuse and take advantage of our kindness—and even end up hurting us.
This hurt can eventually lead to us becoming guarded, and changing our heart posture from good to bad.
I have experienced this a couple of times.
And I believe we should not let people’s behavior be the reason we change from a good person to a bad person.
Recently, I started thinking…
Is there a better way to help people?
Like:
Helping from afar
Helping those who deserve it
Helping those who show gratitude
Helping without expectations
One method of helping I learned today is subtle help.
I’m not even sure if that’s the perfect term, but I believe it’s a type of help where you don’t frame it as “help,” or forcefully try to help people.
According to Google, subtle help involves offering support, guidance, or kindness in indirect, non-obvious ways—so the person doesn’t feel overwhelmed, inadequate, or pressured.
Examples include:
Small thoughtful actions
Nuanced advice
Gentle nudges
Listening deeply and reading between the lines
One interesting part is this:
The same way you can give subtle help, you can also ask for subtle help.
Another way to look at it is: help that is not loud, not forced, and not obvious.
I think knowing how to give subtle help—and how to receive it—is a powerful skill to add to your arsenal.
What do you think?
Feel free to share your thoughts in the comments below.
That’s all for today’s article.
See you tomorrow.